Sex for the 1st time, can be severely painful and it will make you emotionally attached with whoever you are dealing with. That is why it is advisable as a lady, not to allow any guy to deflower you.
Sex is a big deal, especially the first. Before you do it, make sure it’s what you want. Be sure you are doing it because you want to not because you are afraid of losing him or he says he will always cherish you if you do it or because all your friends are sexually active and you feel odd, not even because you are married.
If you haven’t had sex yet and you are reading this, it’s your lucky day today. Here are five important things you should know and consider before it goes down:
- How ready are you and your partner
Except if it is sexual abuse, one has to be ready and anticipate the feeling. Sex from creation, was meant to be enjoyed by man and his wife. One has to be sure he/she is sure of what is about to happen.
Sex is a big deal, especially the first. Before you do it, make sure it’s what you want. Be sure you are doing it because you want to not because you are afraid of losing him or he says he will always cherish you if you do it or because all your friends are sexually active and you feel odd, not even because you are married. Spread your legs and have a man slide his dick and fill you up because that’s what you really want. There are no rules whatsoever. No age is too late either. If you want to do it after you are married, it is absolutely beautiful. Be doubly sure you are sure so you don’t regret it.You can’t have your first time sex twice, always remember.
- Know your body
Explore your body and know what turns you on and what doesn’t. Do you like your nipples bitten or robbed? Do you like your neck kissed and your ear lobes sucked or not? Explore your body and know what works so you won’t be completely clueless.
Your body is yours and you are free to control what should happen. Don’t do anal if you don’t want to. Don’t let him finger you if you don’t want to. Anything at all you aren’t comfortable with is fine, in time you may want it but till then, don’t.
If you want to stop at any point, just say so. Don’t be embarrassed. It’s your body, all yours. If it wasn’t as awesome as you imagined, don’t beat yourself about it. The first time isn’t always the best time and there can always be a second, third, seventeenth, hundredth… time. Always remember though, if you aren’t ready to pop that cherry, don’t.
Maturity, Is something that should be considered before having sex. One should be mentally and emotionally matured for sex. What are your expectations after you have your first sex or as some people will say, ‘lose your virginity’? You hear some ladies go ‘I gave him my virginity and he dumped me’. I think the problem in this situation is their expectation and due to the fact that they weren’t matured for it. Don’t have your first time sex and expect that will make him never leave you. Don’t use it as an emotional blackmail tool either. The man you had sex with for the first time owes you nothing. It happened because you let it, it takes two to tango remember?
Your vagina will be very tight because it hasn’t been in use sexually. If your hymen is still intact and hasn’t been previously broken by vigorous activities you engaged in the past or any other reason, the hole will even be smaller. Medically, it is being advised that before having sex for first time, the partners should make out so as to get them wet and to make it less painful especially on the side of the lady.
Penetration in this case will be painful, very. The vagina needs to be very wet to aid an easy passage of the penis. Chances are you won’t be wet enough because you are nervous and not relaxed. Even if you are wet enough, in first time sex, no wetness is too much.
Buy a sex lubricant and apply lots of it on his penis and let him apply on your vagina, generously. Makes the ride smoother.
- Know your partner
Sex is something that connects two souls together. Knowing your partner is really important and should be put into consideration. Nobody wants to have sex with the wrong person, drug addict, rapist, woman beater etc. knowing your partner, is something that should be put into thorough consideration before having sex.
Knowing who your partner is, will help determine how you see or approach sex. If you know your partner is cool headed and romantic, you will enjoy it but if the opposite, you will be scared of sex and your approach towards sex will be bad.
Your environment is something that you should consider before having sex. It baffles me when people tell me they had their 1st sex in the toilet or inside gutter. Your environment should enhance your peace of mind as well as your emotions and feelings towards it.
The environment should be clean as well as the partners because “I can’t imagine myself having sex with someone who has body or mouth odour”.